Smoke me a kipper

I'll be back for breakfast

I've been sanctioned

I've been working with a member of Apples Executive Management team on
a customer service issue in Sweden.

The "project" took 5 weeks to gain traction, during which time I got
to know a staff member reasonably well, as a result I was sent a brand
new iPhone 3Gs.

On the way to the airport, my wife, excited by the prospect of "free
kit" turned to me and said "I wonder if you'll get a free macbook pro
if you shag her?".

Glad she's taking her vows seriously....